Thursday, July 05, 2007

A Gastronomic Miracle!

While shopping for the Fourth of July festivities, I came across an exciting new innovation in the snack chip wars -- corn tortilla chips that taste like corn!

I don't know why no one thought of this before. I can just imagine the meeting where they discussed the situation:

Bob: No one is buying our corn tortilla chips and I don't know why.
Stan: It's bizarre. I mean come on, they taste just like broccoli!
Bob: Exactly! I wonder what else we could make them taste like.
[puzzled silence]
Stan: You know this is kind of a crazy idea but ... nah, never mind.
Bob: No no, go on, I'm curious what your thoughts are.
Stan: Well, if you're sure ... I feel kind of silly even bringing it up but since you insist ... what if we -- now hang on to your hat here, this is pretty wild -- what if we made our corn tortilla chips taste like ... corn!?

Unfortunately we don't have a record of Bob's reaction because his head exploded at the unprecedented concept. What we DO have, however, is a close-up of the label announcing to the world this ground-breaking moment in food technology:

I hope you join me in studiously avoiding the thought "If they only just now made these here corn tortilla chips taste like corn, what in the name of all that's good and right did they taste like before?"


Allen said...

Wait, I'm confused (so what else is new?).

Don't tortilla chips grow fully formed from the ground from the tortilla plant? You're telling me these things are made from corn? Git outta town!

Anonymous said...

Actually the tortilla chip is the young leaf of the tortilla plant. The flower of the tortilla plant is of course the tortilla. We Americans have once again mangled another foreign tongue, and hence we inappropriately call them "flour tortillas" instead of the correct "tortilla flower." Gringos.