Sunday, May 14, 2006

Sting of the Scorpion

We had dinner with our friend the other night and I got the full scoop on the "Scorpion Stings Boob Twice" story.

It was dusk and our friend saw that her donkey was outside begging for a treat. She put on flip-flops and ran out for what was supposed to be a quick trip, not bothering to put on a bra (which rarely happens but hey, when you're out in the country it's no big deal). While leaning forward to hand out the treat, she felt something drop into her shirt from the tree above.

Moments later she felt a sharp stabbing pain in the right breast and yelped, dashing around the yard and yanking on her top to try and dislodge whatever had violated her person. Unfortunately the jiggering and gyrating slung the critter over to the other breast, where she again felt the horrible sting.

Finally she was able to dash back inside and the creature was expelled, but the damage was done. "It was like a plug of flesh had been taken out of both of them," she said. The one penetration mark and intense pain convinced her it was a scorpion and not a bee or spider.

Which, strangely, is a relief, as there are few things more dreaded in central Texas than the bite of a brown recluse spider (click here for more info on those guys, including some truly gross photos towards the bottom). Their bites can kill off a huge area of flesh, causing it to rot out.

"I thought my boobs would fall off," our friend said, so it was actually a relief that the culprit was "just" a scorpion.

3 comments:

with sprinkles said...

Thanks for the update. It all makes perfect sense. My imagination was running wild with that one.

John said...

checked out the brown recluse link. One word: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

Rob Rogers said...

You can tell I'm a geek because...

I looked at that picture and thought, "Ooh, cool! Shadowfist card!"